A RELATIONSHIP AWARENESS SYSTEM

A RELATIONSHIP AWARENESS SYSTEM

Understand what your relationships are showing you.

Understand what your relationships are showing you.

Understand what your relationships are showing you.

The pattern is usually there. It's just hard to see from inside it.

The pattern is usually there. It's just hard to see from inside it.

The pattern is usually there. It's just hard to see from inside it.

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01 — ENERGY

01 — ENERGY

See where your energy goes.

See where your energy goes.

See where your energy goes.

Not every person affects you the same. Not every interaction does either.

Not every person affects you the same. Not every interaction does either.

1
Draining
2
Tiring
3
Mixed
4
Affirming
5
Energizing

02 — NOTICE

02 — NOTICE

Something feels different.
You just may not know why yet.

Something feels different.
You just may not know why yet.

Something feels different.
You just may not know why yet.

Why am I always the one making the plan?Why am I always the one making the plan?

03 — TRACK

03 — TRACK

Don't lose the moments that matter.

Don't lose the moments that matter.

Don't lose the moments that matter.

A quick check-in keeps what happened, how it felt, and any context you want to remember together.

A quick check-in keeps what happened, how it felt, and any context you want to remember together.

Devon
12 interactions
Sep 8 · Dinner
Energizing
“Felt easy and supportive. Made the plan again.”
Sep 5 · Text
Mixed
“Short replies but still kind.”
Aug 28 · Hangout
Draining
“Felt like I was doing most of the talking.”
Aug 20 · Coffee
Affirming
“Good conversation. We laughed a lot.”
Aug 12 · Call
Draining
“Took a while to reply.”

04 — UNDERSTAND

04 — UNDERSTAND

One interaction is a feeling. Repeated interactions become a pattern.

Over time, your record becomes easier to understand — showing how the relationship has been trending, what keeps repeating, and where the connection stands now.

Over time, your record becomes easier to understand — showing how the relationship has been trending, what keeps repeating, and where the connection stands now.

Devon
Affirming · 14 interactions
74
ENERGY SCORE
Friend Energy Trend
90 days
DrainingTiringMixedAffirmingEnergizingJUN 12JUL 27TODAY
↗
Trending up
· based on 14 interactions
Interactions with Devon have felt more affirming recently.
Relationship compass
Aligned
Low
Strong
Misaligned
Strong chemistry, partly aligned.
You connect easily, but what each of you needs from the friendship does not always line up.
Values fit
Shared
45%
Partly
32%
Not yet
23%
What may help next time
Be clear about what you need, and give him room to show up in his own way.
Your Energy Score reflects your experience with this person over time.
05 — Prepare
Know what tends to happen — and what to try next.
See what tends to happen, what may help, and ask anything before you go.
Know the pattern before you're in it
What has actually been happening, not what you remember.
One thing to try, not a plan
A single move. Nobody needs a strategy for a dinner.
Ask in your own words
Anything, about one person, right before you go.
Ethan
14 interactions
Mixed
Pattern found
Better one-on-one.
Time together tends to feel easier and more connected when it's just the two of you. Group settings can feel less steady.
How to optimize
Start one-on-one
Keep plans low pressure
Follow up after group hangs
Forecast
Group dinner with Ethan tonight. Anything I should keep in mind?
Likely energy: mixed.
One-on-one time with Ethan tends to feel steadier than group settings. Keep the plan low pressure, and a quick check-in afterwards can help.
Expected energy
Likely mixed
How to optimize
Start one-on-one
Mindfulness
Read before you go
Same people. A more prepared you.
The way your relationships affect you is worth paying attention to.
Why this matters
Not all relationships affect you the same. Relationship quality matters.
29% / 32%
Poor social relationships are associated with a 29% higher risk of heart disease and a 32% higher risk of stroke.
U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on Social Connection, 2023
23 years
Adults whose positive friendship quality stayed high and rose over time reported better health and fewer depressive symptoms 23 years later.
Ajrouch et al., Developmental Psychology, 2024 · 553 adults
9,011 people
Followed for 12 years, those who reported more negative aspects in their close relationships had a higher rate of coronary events.
De Vogli, Chandola & Marmot, Archives of Internal Medicine, 2007
The quality of the relationships around you matters. Knowing which ones give back — and which ones consistently take — matters too.
Associational findings. None of these studies establish cause and effect.

Your relationships shape your life. You should be able to understand them.

Start with one person. The rest follows.

The Tea

The relationship stuff you keep thinking about, finally put into words.

Friendships. Dating. Boundaries. Mixed signals. Growing apart. The people you can’t quite figure out.

01
The friend who only texts when they need something
It feels good to be needed. Then you start noticing the shape of it.
02
She posted the plan. Everyone said yes. Then silence.
It is not only you. Here is what tends to be happening underneath.
03
Same story, third time this month
Why the pattern keeps repeating, and where it can be interrupted.

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